Health & Happiness from the Kitchen.

1. When you are floating. Eat chocolate in the bathtub. Your weightlessness counterbalances the calories. So says the movie Ginger and Cinnamon. And if it’s in a film it’s fact. Plus, it’s a foreign film making it even more credible.
2. When you’re PMSing. The number of tears you shed and little fits of rage you have well makes up for the calories of the chocolate, therefore rending the chocolate calorie-less.
3. When it’s melted to the wrapper and you have to suck it off. This is not, in fact, fatty behavior. It’s genius behavior because you have to work harder to get the chocolate and there for burn more calories making the chocolate calorie-less, if not even negative calories. #logicFTW
4. When it’s really hot out, probably resulting in #3. Because not only will you be burning calories trying to suck the chocolate off the wrapper, but you’ll be sweating the chocolate out anyway.

This message has been brought to you by me chocoholics-anonymous.

Sometimes my life…

Now, I know that I have a good life. I am extremely lucky: I have a wonderful husband, great—though frustrating—parents, my little sister is my best friend and I have great friends.

However, sometimes my life seems to just be a parade of errors.

Sometimes it’s little things. Like tonight is breakfast for dinner, so I went to make pancake mix and the cornmeal has weevils in it and there is practically no baking soda. Or I get to work and minutes later Pete texts me letting me know he’s all done with work. Or I make a grocery list and forget significant things that I need for dinner—like cheese, cheese is always significant. Or I need to do my homework—online classes for the win—and my internet won’t connect.

Those are the little things.

Then sometimes it’s things like plans we (my family) make the night before almost never go off as they are suppose to. Like Pete get’s off early…or late or mom changes her mind with her plan and needs the car, blah blah blah. Or when Pete was at his old job and they didn’t pay us on time or didn’t approve his hours when they were suppose to. Or getting excited about buying a house and then find out about the $2600 worth of car repairs. Or my parent’s having to file for bankruptcy. Or my dad giving his 2 weeks notice at his new hotel job.

Yes, I realize I probably sound like I’m complaining, but sometimes when things finally seem like they are calming down or that I can finally move forward in my life, something comes up and I have to, yet again, take a step back.

I’m tired. That’s why this is frustrating me. Especially the weevils…

That’s all…

Ok, so I think that Alisa and I some sort of weird…. twin-y connection.

While, I haven’t fallen off the wagon. I have been….mmm….drifting out of the wagon circle?

While I absolutely believe that you can lose weight and still eat things like ice cream or frozen yogurt or chips or what have you, I have been “over indulging” lately. I have (trader joe’s brand) cheetos or potato chips with lunch most days. I have been eating less fruit & veg. I haven’t been drinking as much water as a should. And I have been eating more dessert then I used to. Again, I’m still losing weight/maintaining, which is a good thing.

And yet, my desire to not eat processed foods is waning. Mainly because of exhaustion, but also because I felt like my dad & hubs have needed “junk food.” Ugh. I know I know, not an excuse.

So today when I went grocery shopping, I did buy the (trader joe’s brand) cheetos and some pirate booty for my dad (he has a rough day and give his notice at his new job…long story), but I also bought fruits and veggies. Lots of blueberries, a thing of strawberries, a giant cucumber, potatoes, zucchini, red bell pepper, avocados and lettuce. And I will not be consuming the junk food (healthy junk food as it may be), I will be snacking on fruits and veg. My body misses them.

I know that my, um, let’s call it a stumble…has been because of sheer exhaustion and, well, let’s be honest, laziness. I haven’t even been cooking as much. I’m working on bring it back around, especially since I did a months worth of meal planning.

Anyway, my little tumblr-ites, whom I love, that is my confession.

Ugh. Although, I think waking up at quarter to 5 after going to bed at midnight gives me the right to be a little scatter brained. That, on top of my knee KILLING me…. again. Is such a bummer.

I’m kinda failing at my Operation: Real Weight thing. Yes, so far, it has definitely shown that sodium and water has a definitive effect on the weight on the scale. Which is why I’m annoyed that I haven’t been able to be consistent with my little operation/challenge/thingy.

Anywhooooo. Also. I should write romance novels. Just sayin’.

BMR: 2500 calories
Calorie Intake: ~1820 calories
Sodium Intake: ~1800mg (max sodium should be 2500mg)
Water: ~52 oz. + ~20 oz. tea
Under BMR: Yes
Change in Weight: Loss of 1.7 lbs. (222.4 lbs)

Huh.

I don’t really know what to say about that number.

My Saturday calories were like 800 (because of my 13 hour nap), and then yesterday was a little higher than normal because I woke up at 2 am and was starving and I needed to eat something, sooo I counted them for yesterday.

Almost back to my lowest weight (lately).

Also, can I just say, that 4 years ago…. well a little over that, but 4ish years ago, I weighed in at 214 lbs when I first started personal training. I lost like 2 or 3 lbs doing the personal training and ballroom dancing. So, in 10 lbs I will be at my lowest weight in…. 5 years.

So, hopefully in a couple months?

Yesterday at 1 p.m. the hubs & I went to lay down for a nap. I was exhausted after no sleep the night before.

Fast forward and my sleepy hubs starts mumbling asking me if I ever got up. I figured he was sleep walking and told him it was night time.

Pete: But I don’t remember dinner.

Me: Oh shit, neither do I! What time is it?!

Pete: Almost 2 a.m.

That’s right folks, this girl took an almost 13 hour nap. Obviously I am much more comfortable sleeping with my husband there….

But I couldn’t believe it.

I have some stuff to do today—like go to my little cousin’s birthday party with presents for 6 little cousins in tow since I’ve missed so many parties (#failure)—but hopefully I’ll have time to post my eggplant parm recipe (or, at least write some of it out to post tomorrow) and, for somewhat obvious reasons Operation: Real Weight is postponed til tomorrow since it would be all types of fracked up.

Buying gifts for friends/family who just had babies breaks my heart a little. :-(

BMR: 2500 calories
Calorie Intake: ~1350 calories (wayyyy too low for me, lack of sleep is making me less hungry. rawr)
Sodium Intake: ~2100mg (max sodium should be 2500mg)
Water: ~52 oz. + ~20 oz. tea
Under BMR: Yes
Change in Weight: Loss of .7 lbs. (224.1 lbs)

But seriously. How freaking interesting is this?! You drink enough water, and don’t eat too much sodium (your body does need sodium so you can’t cut it out all together) you weight will totally change.

This is why I’m doing this little mad scientist experiment. Because sometimes it’s honestly not the number of calories you eat, but legitimately what you eat.

Also, turkey meatloaf saltier then I thought it would be. But pretty delicious if I do say so myself.

Another factor that I can’t quantify is that my lack of sleep and stress level will also be effecting my weight. Unfortunately, I can’t really measure that…. :-/

This one in particular got to me. Partly because the main character kinda sounded like me. Like looks wise, obviously not exactly like me, but tall with long (dark) black hair and a curvy figure and round face. Not the typical tiny, blonde heroin. Also, partly because the story reminded me of the love life I had assumed on myself before meeting my hubs.

Why am I a sucker? Well, other than crying for about 2 hours while I was listening to it. I started listening to it again.

And will probably listen to it a third time. I told you I was missing my hubs! haha

It’s $2.95 oniTtunes. You should listen to it too. Mmmm

Turkey meatloaf.

On the stove top. Garlic mashed potatoes.

Outside. Glorious rain. Earth shattering thunder. Sky-splitting lightening.

On a more personal note. This hubs working the night shift thing is a lot harder than I thought it would be. I miss him being next to me. It’s comforting. His body has been there almost every-night for 4 years. Even just the warmth of this body is missed (I don’t call him lava skin for nothing). But, what I keep reminding myself is that this is all for the best. He probably won’t be working this shift for much longer.

I think the drama on here (this will be the only time I mention it) has just made me think about how. I had, for a while, let the likes and comments sway what I wrote. But my journey is so tightly intertwined with this community that I am not ready to give it up or give up on it. I know that I have not been as active here as I used to be. And I have always known that I get out what I put into this community. I was so supportive when I first started. But lately it’s seemed like an overwhelming tasking. I desperately love the people on here and they have helped me through a lot. And a lot more then they know.

Yes I’m the one who has lost the weight. But I don’t know if I would have been as successful at getting it off or keeping it off if it wasn’t for y’all.

XO S

BMR: 2500 calories
Calorie Intake: ~1600 calories
Sodium Intake: ~1350mg (max sodium should be 2500mg)
Water: ~52 oz. + ~20 oz. tea
Under BMR: Yes
Change in Weight: Loss of 1 lbs. (224.8 lbs)

Loss of a pound in a day (i.e. it wasn’t “there” to begin with). It’s still a little higher than my last WIW weigh in, but I’m 90% sure that lack of sleep and high stress is keeping some of the weight on.

Anywho. So far ORW has proven my theory. I ate too much sodium—and was under my calories—the day before yesterday, and gained weight. I ate less sodium and drank more water and “lost” a pound. Excellent so far. I enjoy when things work the way I expect them to. Huzzah.

Sleepy.

The Good:

• Officially got an A in Chemistry. Yessss
  

  

• Hit 365 days straight of logging my calories on myfitnesspal! That doesn’t always mean I was under my calorie limit, but at least I’m tracking. Prettty awesome!
  

  

• Pizza for dinner. Nom
• I’m excited about Operation: Real Weight. I’m really looking forward to showing people that sometimes it’s not the number of calories, it really might be what you’re eating.

The Bad:

• 2ish hours of sleep. I’m having a hell of a time sleeping at night without my hubs :-/
• Driving across town multiple times times a day is getting ridiculous.
• Pete’s schedule is allllll over the place. He was suppose to work 11pm-7am, but he’s been working until 8am and 9am this morning. Holy overtime batman.
• Because of lack of sleep I haven’t been hungry, which is more annoying then anything.
• Financial aid. The end.
• My knee is being a bitch again. Like hardcore. It hurts. A lot…all the time. All the driving isn’t helping.
• I have to make the pizza. Which I don’t mind, but when my knee hurts, it’s not that great.

The…:

• This room is hot.
• Room darkening blinds for the win.
• I definitely have a new found appreciation for a good nap. BUT I CAN’T SLEEP ANYMORE. WTF?
• I’ll probably have a gain or no loss tomorrow. Cause of sodium *shrug*
• I spent $110 at Trader Joe’s today, you should see our fridge! I’m super excited about the haul!

I continuously see the same thing on WIW. Someone who worked really hard throughout the week yet saw a gain. It’s probably the most frustrating thing about this journey.

Now. Science tells us that unless you eat 3500 calories MORE then your BMR then you have not gained a pound of fat.

My BMR is 2500 calories, so, unless I eat 2500 calories PLUS an additional 3500 then it’s not a fat gain.

So here is my challenge/experiment. Starting tomorrow (after WIW) I will be tracking my sodium and (attempting to) track my water intake and my calories—these will be approximations, but close enough to use.

I will weight myself each morning to show the fluctuation in my weight.

I’ll then post my weight, my calorie intake, my sodium intake, and (if I can finagle it) my water intake.

I’m hoping this experiment can show how influenced your weight can be. And not by the number of calories you eat. (I’m hoping my stress level and lack of sleep won’t compromise the experiment.)

I just need a name for it.

So what do you think?

Ugh, I want to order my textbooks off Amazon (mainly because I’m sick of driving so much. call me lazy) BUT Pima does such wacky book combinations that I’m worried that I’ll get the wrong thing.

How annoying.

#whitegirlproblems?

The only downside to having pets…is when they do something disgusting on the floor…and you step on it.

So last night I brought my hubs for his first day (night) of work. I got home at about 11:30. I kept trying to sleep. But I really couldn’t. I think I finally fell asleep a little before 1 am. But it wasn’t a peaceful sleep.

I woke up at 6:00 so I could eat a little (cause I always wake up starving) and drink some tea before leaving at 6:30 am to pick him up.

Well. At 7 am I get a call asking where I am. I tell him I’m outside the student union. He says that he’s going over things an might be another hour.

1) poor poor guy. He must be exhausted & 2) poor me! I’m across town from home. Luckily I had stuff I had to drop off for my little sis. She works at Starbucks and I got a water (cause of course I forgot my water.) But now I have 45ish minutes to kill.

And I’m exhausted. How am I going to get through the rest of this day? I’m suppose to work. But that might not be happening. We shall see. I’m also suppose to get my books. But the bookstore doesn’t open til 8. And being this tired and having to spend $500ish on books might push me over the edge (just kidding, but seriously. That’s way too much money.)

Starting a new project on Wednesday that I’ll talk more about later.

Or layer since I wrote that 3 times….

Spent a hour or so baking banana bread so my hubs would have a special treat to take with him on his first (night shift) day of work. Then I realized that I never had taken a picture of my banana bread/posted a recipe with picture.

Today was an extraordinarily long day. I feel like I’ve done a thousand and one things today, and on only 6 hours of sleep. Woke up, made breakfast, went to Target, hung curtain over door (for day sleeping), cleaned, folded laundry, went out to lunch with the hubs, made banana bread, took a nap (but I didn’t couldn’t sleep), made grilled cheese, cut my hubs hair and I still have 3ish hours until I can go to sleep. And can I just say, it’s going to be weird that I will be sleeping and my hubs won’t be there. Not just that, he’ll be working. Weird.

I should have taken a better picture….oh well. Deeeelicious banana bread.

1 1/2 cup whole wheat flour
2/3 cup sugar
1 1/4 teaspoon baking powder
3/4 teaspoon sea salt
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
2 2/3 ripe bananas, halved & diced
1/3 cup butter
2 eggs
2 tablespoons chia seeds
1 teaspoon vanilla extract 

Preheat oven to 350º. Spray a loaf pan (or 3 mini loaf pans—easier for portion sizing) with canola oil or other non stick spray. Flour pan.

Mix together dry ingredients. Cream together wet ingredients (not including banana). Mix until combined (do not over mix). Fold in banana.

Pour into floured loaf pan (or pans). Bake for 40-50 minutes. (30-35 minutes for mini loafs)

A big loaf makes 14 servings: Calories: 191; Carbs: 30g; Sodium: 249mg; Protein: 4g; Sugar: 15g; Fiber: 3g

The mini loafs make 24 servings, about 8 servings per loaf: Calories: 96; Carbs: 15g; Sodium: 125mg; Protein: 2g; Sugar: 7g; Fiber: 2g

It’s a great basic recipe, adding: chocolate chips, walnuts, or whatever your little heart desires. I’m still working on making this the healthiest recipe I can, so it’s an continuous work in progress :-)

Number of tears shed today re: financial aid: 0
Number of unnecessary calories eaten out of frustration: 0 (unless you count my breakfast burrito which was the only thing my stomach could handle thanks to my intense migraine, but I’m not counting it.)
Number of dollars spent during retail therapy: $41

I would say that those first two are pretty good NSV. My stomach issues have been pretty fracked up though. It’s pretty disconcerting. Most “strong” food have been too much for me/makes me feel nauseous even to just think about eating certain foods.

I’m now watching X-men (the cartoon) with my hubs, then off to bed cause I have an early morning breakfast with 2 besties.

When I’m sick, or depressed, or…well, anything other than happy. I usually would turn to food. But since I started this whole journey, I have really tried to not turn to food. Unfortunately for my wallet, I shop instead. Usually I’m pretty good about putting things in my cart, but not actually checking out. 

It’s made from corrugated cardboard AND fulfills my love of ecofriendly products.

It’s not huge, which is great because it’s a lowish ceiling and a small space. I’m pretty excited. On top of it all, it was $148 originally, but it was on sale for $34.99! Holler. I love me a good sale. Especially when it’s an anthropologie sale and even non-anthropologie pendants can be more than that.

Yes. I am avoiding all a majority of things in my life. Like my throbbing headache. BUT since I’m nauseous I can’t eat my feelings (nor should it *cough*) and at least this is helpful retail therapy.

On the upside, I finally decided to stop being a hermit and I am having breakfast tomorrow morning with 2 of my besties. I haven’t seen them since I started my whirlwind chem class. Bad Sarah.

Hmmm. I think I’ve rambled enough. Although. I’m still wondering about the whole BMR thing. Could mine really be that different then what all the sites say it should be? Is that possible?

*Image stolen/borrowed from frombridgettocarrie*

M E A S U R E M E N T S — on new scale*

 Weight:
  highest - 280 lbs.
  starting - 275 lbs. 276 lbs.
  was - 223.7* lbs
  now - 222.2* (-1.5)

 Total Inches lost: 44.75”
 Total Pounds lost: 53.8 lbs

I figured I should do a more “official” one of these since the first one was hurriedly done on my phone while I was waiting for financial aid death march meeting.

I was so excited to see this new weight. I can’t WAIT to be out of the 220’s especially since I’ve been there since… like…oh, December?!

Now, I know this a journey, but being stuck in the same 10 pounds for like 8 months is a little too much. The weird thing is, I’ve recently dropped my calories back down again, since I haven’t been able to work out like I was before…the weird thing is, I’m now wondering if my metabolism or body could be bizarro and actually have a lower BRM then every website on the planet tells me?

Is that even possible?

Oh well. Another 1.5 lbs gone. Holler. I’m pretty sure that’s 1.5 lbs of tears. Ha.

222.2 lbs (-1.3 lbs)

Holler. More later.

I will not cry thankyouverymuch

So apparently I need to submit an appeal for financial aid because I have taken too many units and don’t have a degree. Then a committee gets to review my appeal and decide if I get financial aid or not.

You’ve got to be kidding me.

Hello! You can see I switched majors and I was at the U for 2 years before that.Taking too long to get my degree?! Seriously, would someone who took summer school do that for…fun? No, I’m obviously trying to finish up my degree!

Ugh, but nooooo. Apparently now it’s against the (financial aid) law to not know what you want to do with your life right off the bat.

M*****F******!!!!!!

rawr.

I’m gonna go cry in a corner now.

Celebration cake for finally finishing my chemistry class! Got a 90% on my chem final, wish I had done better, but a 90% is still good. I will probably end up with an A in my chem class, which would be fantabulous.

Although, I have this crazy fear that pass this class isn’t actually anything. That when I transfer to the U that they will see me as a fraud. That it will prove that I don’t actually know chemistry… ugh. I hate being this freaked out.

ANYWAY. Pete went and did his paperwork for his new job yesterday. His first shift is 11 pm - 7 am. Holy cow. He will be working that shift until he learns that shift, then he will be switching to another shift. And it will be like that until he learns all the different shifts/jobs. So it’s going to be pretty hectic.

I feel bad that I haven’t been around here lately though. I have been so focused on chemistry and Pete’s job and making sure he has everything he needs, that I have barely had time to read or write.

But I did have a little time to make a chocolatey-snacky-zucchini cake. After going to Target to get Pete a razor (he has to shave his beard :-( sad day) and Trader Joe’s. And after doing a month of meal planning.

Hyper-organized is my new middle name.

I’ve posted this before, but I figured posting it again wouldn’t hurt anything :-)

Chocolate-Zucchini Cake

1. Preheat the oven to 350°F. Coat an 11” x 8” baking pan with cooking spray.
2. Combine the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt in a large bowl.
3. Whisk the eggs, sugar, yogurt, oil, and vanilla extract in a medium bowl. Whisk in the zucchini and 1 1/2 cups of the chips. Stir into the flour mixture just until blended. Spread into the prepared pan and bake for 30 minutes or until lightly browned and a wooden toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.
4. Remove from the oven and sprinkle the remaining 1 1/2 cups chips over the cake. Spread with a small spatula as they melt to form an icing, placing back into the warm oven, if needed, for about 1 minute.

Nutrition Info Per Serving (1/16 of cake):  Calories: 274, Protein: 5g, Carbs: 47g, Fat: 13g, Fiber: 3g, Sodium: 128mg

HE GOT THE JOB!!! MY HUSBAND IS NOW THE LEAD BAKER/ASSISTANT MANAGER AT THE UofA!

Hoooooly crap. Talk about a load off my mind!

*Image stolen/borrowed from frombridgettocarrie*

M E A S U R E M E N T S — on new scale*

 Weight:
  highest - 280 lbs.
  starting - 275 lbs. 276 lbs.
  was - 225.2* lbs
  now - 223.7* (-1.5)

 Inches lost this past two months: 2”
 Total Inches lost: 44.75”
 Total Pounds lost: 52.3 lbs

Halle-freakin-lujah! I am now almost back to my lowest weight yet, but on the new scale that weighs me heavier then the wiiFit ever did.

And this is the day after the finish of that time of the month.

Yesterday my mom told me that I look thinner every time she sees me. Which, is funny and awesome in different ways.

1. I see my mom everyday (and night) because I work with her and live at home.
2. It’s hard to see progress when you see someone everyday.
3. I used to think my mom was ashamed of the way I looked. She’s so small and…. dainty looking and I’m this gigantically tall and large person. I used to think that’s why she always wanted me to dress more modestly. But now I think it’s just because she’s a modest person.

Anyway, I’ve been meaning to write for a while….but I had almost too many things going around in my head. Self confidence issues and discussion, my battles with eating disorder habits of old, my worries about my metablism, wishing on every star that my husband gets this job, pining for a house of my own, and being stressed about money because Pete’s stupid work didn’t pay his past pay day because the woman who usually does the payroll wasn’t there and his hours didn’t get approved.

*exhales deeply*

BUT. How freaking excited am I that I’m more or less back to my lowest weight again! Hazzah!